I adopted a very, and very is a mild descriptor in this instance, 12 year old boy about 25 years ago. It was a rough go, I fought with the police, the schools, the Health and Welfare social workers, you name it and I fought with it. Surprisingly enough the only one who seemed to be on my side was the county prosecutor. There were about 10 very ugly stressful years.
The rules were pretty simple, you do not lie, cheat, or steal. As long as I do not have to smell you or your room, cleanliness is your own issue.
His friend's parents thought I was a butt. His friends were pretty much allowed to run wild. When he was about twenty someone started giving me hell about always fighting with him. He surprised me by telling that person they were correct, but that the reason for that was that I was the only person who ever cared about him.
Today, we get along fairly well, talk about just about everything, he calls for advice etc.. He is self supporting, seems to be appreciated at his place of employment, is raising a child as a single parent, and keeps his nose clean. While he is not where I would have liked him to be, I am overjoyed he is doing as well as he is.
Yesterday I picked up the paper and on the front page was his good friend from high school whose parents felt free to berate me about being strict. The friend is in his late thirties, living in a slum, and was pictured receiving a box of food from a charity. He looked terrible. The narrative pretty much indicated his poor quality of life was everyone else's fault.
I wonder if the friend's parents ever think about this.
The rules were pretty simple, you do not lie, cheat, or steal. As long as I do not have to smell you or your room, cleanliness is your own issue.
His friend's parents thought I was a butt. His friends were pretty much allowed to run wild. When he was about twenty someone started giving me hell about always fighting with him. He surprised me by telling that person they were correct, but that the reason for that was that I was the only person who ever cared about him.
Today, we get along fairly well, talk about just about everything, he calls for advice etc.. He is self supporting, seems to be appreciated at his place of employment, is raising a child as a single parent, and keeps his nose clean. While he is not where I would have liked him to be, I am overjoyed he is doing as well as he is.
Yesterday I picked up the paper and on the front page was his good friend from high school whose parents felt free to berate me about being strict. The friend is in his late thirties, living in a slum, and was pictured receiving a box of food from a charity. He looked terrible. The narrative pretty much indicated his poor quality of life was everyone else's fault.
I wonder if the friend's parents ever think about this.
