How to wash your wife's cat

[bronko220002]

I posted this on the sister site but thought it may be beneficial to a few of you guys.

How to wash your wife's cat:
1. Open toilet lid make sure toilet is flushed first and only filled with clean water.
2. Add 1 oz of liquid dish detergent.
3. Leave toilet seat and lid open and find cat.
4. Holding cat by scruff of the neck with one hand and the other on the seat and lid toss cat into toilet and immediately shut lid. This is really tricky and you need to be fast. Be sure to hold the seat down. DO NOT SIT ON SEAT as paws may come through the space and scratch thighs.
Note: there is no need to assist in washing as the cat will agitate the water sufficiently to wash itself.
5. After several minutes or whenever you think the cat is clean enough flush the toilet repeatedly.
I recommend a minimum of three times.
6. Extremely important: be sure the bathroom door is open as well as a door to the outside. Also when you raise the toilet seat lid stand to the side so as not to be injured.

Although your wife's cat will be clean you may not see it for a while!
Thanks for reading and I hope this information is helpful.

 

[edmehlig]

Or let your wife go to the bathroom

 

[michiganmuzzy]

That is almost exactly how i wash my cat. Although i have added a bidet(butt rinser). not necessary but it makes for a quicker more thorough clean and rinse.

 

[Hanshi]

I preferred to gently brush my little buddy instead of washing the poor critter. As an adult he was still very small by normal cat standards. I am mostly a dog person but the right cat can steal your heart.

 

[Va Hunter]

I know of someone who’s cat snuck into the washer while she was getting clothes together to wash. He went through the whole wash cycle. Surprised it didn’t kill him but he walked funny for a week.

 

[michiganmuzzy]

I would never actually wash my cat. But Ive had to give her a shot with the sprayer bottle a time or two, little demon, she is.

 

[Shorty]

I would never actually wash my cat. But Ive had to give her a shot with the sprayer bottle a time or two, little demon, she is. View attachment 36895

I take it the spray bottle is the butt washer????

 

[michiganmuzzy]

I take it the spray bottle is the butt washer????

No, but, my wifer was using the bidet for the first time, her cat was standing in front of her and the throne, when she hit that bidet the water missed everything(her butt) went between her legs, and blasted her cat right in the face
They both screamed, water went all over the bath room, cat went tearing outta there and under the bed for hours. When wifer asked why it did that i had to explain the difference between boys and girls and how sh needs to sit on the throne ‘differently’ before activating the water and adjusting where it goes. Laughed at them for so long…

 

[retrieverman]

Ok, I have a dirty mind, because when I saw the thread title, I thought it was about something else using euphemisms.

 

[michiganmuzzy]

Ok, I have a dirty mind, because when I saw the thread title, I thought it was about something else using euphemisms.

Yeah i think we are all avoiding a couple of obvious jokes.

 

[Shorty]

Yeah i think we are all avoiding a couple of obvious jokes.

Thats a mad pussy cat. Lol

 

[Hausser1]

Or let your wife go to the bathroom

the correct term is "wifer". Remember, they love to be called "wifer"... almost as much as being politely referred to as "the help"..

 

[Hausser1]

Catz make great top water lures. Just hook 'em thru the collar and zing 'em out on Lake St Claire. With all the commotion, well, it drives the muskys crazy..

 

[11th Corps]

"Try putting me in your toilet."

"There will be hell to pay."

 

[michiganmuzzy]

There will be blood

 

[Ninering62]

the correct term is "wifer". Remember, they love to be called "wifer"... almost as much as being politely referred to as "the help"..

You will find that learning how to say “ ex-wifer “ will come much easier though

 

[newby to BP]

I posted this on the sister site but thought it may be beneficial to a few of you guys.

How to wash your wife's cat:
1. Open toilet lid make sure toilet is flushed first and only filled with clean water.
2. Add 1 oz of liquid dish detergent.
3. Leave toilet seat and lid open and find cat.
4. Holding cat by scruff of the neck with one hand and the other on the seat and lid toss cat into toilet and immediately shut lid. This is really tricky and you need to be fast. Be sure to hold the seat down. DO NOT SIT ON SEAT as paws may come through the space and scratch thighs.
Note: there is no need to assist in washing as the cat will agitate the water sufficiently to wash itself.
5. After several minutes or whenever you think the cat is clean enough flush the toilet repeatedly.
I recommend a minimum of three times.
6. Extremely important: be sure the bathroom door is open as well as a door to the outside. Also when you raise the toilet seat lid stand to the side so as not to be injured.

Although your wife's cat will be clean you may not see it for a while!
Thanks for reading and I hope this information is helpful.

Just remember, that cat knows where you sleep.

 

[Hausser1]

https://www.google.com/search?gs_ss...#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:e4502f25,vid:cqZc7ZQURMs

 

[Ninering62]

https://www.google.com/search?gs_ss...#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:e4502f25,vid:cqZc7ZQURMs

I remember that song

 

[Whokalouie]

Put soap on the cat from neck to tail, turn on and adjust to warm water in small shower stall, insert cat and close door. In 20 minutes tell wife you forgot to turn shower off and ask if she could do it for you.